if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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