There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
What drink are we having for lunch?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
