I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
