I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize