So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Let's get the cat blown out
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
