rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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