i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Four minutes until I can fart!
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
