a queef is a wish your heart makes.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
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