just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize