Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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