He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Randomize