yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize