At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
