He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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