Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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