I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Randomize
