Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
