pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
