North Korea, Best Korea!
I bet he comes in French.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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