I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
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