Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
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