And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
