do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize