She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize