At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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