Texts From Last Night

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  (480): View more from Arizona

  I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?

  (408): View more from California

  oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no

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  (480): I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy? (408): oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no http://tfl.nu/w6ll
  Replies (4) Good night (1161) Bad night (3181)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.

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  (732): I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one. http://tfl.nu/pu4o
  Replies (12) Good night (538) Bad night (2844)
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  (225): View more from Louisiana

  were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever

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  (225): were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever http://tfl.nu/h34v
  Replies (30) Good night (6183) Bad night (607)
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  (408): View more from California

  Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?

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  (408): Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut? http://tfl.nu/riq0
  Replies (39) Good night (1269) Bad night (4447)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours

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  (419): You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours http://tfl.nu/i7uw
  Replies (2) Good night (2075) Bad night (675)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's

  (1-978): View more from Massachusetts

  SMART GIRL

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  (978): there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's (1-978): SMART GIRL http://tfl.nu/njon
  Replies (2) Good night (1741) Bad night (604)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?

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  (727): Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now? http://tfl.nu/ch6a
  Replies (11) Good night (684) Bad night (1422)
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night

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  (262): Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night http://tfl.nu/r3zi
  Replies (2) Good night (1299) Bad night (422)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer

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  (240): Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer http://tfl.nu/mrff
  Replies (4) Good night (1337) Bad night (572)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(

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  (705): Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :( http://tfl.nu/qlv4
  Replies (2) Good night (551) Bad night (310)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!

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  (281): She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave! http://tfl.nu/tzuo
  Replies (12) Good night (939) Bad night (556)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.

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  (650): Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels. http://tfl.nu/tpw7
  Replies (1) Good night (766) Bad night (223)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak

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  (585): I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak http://tfl.nu/2vt3
  Replies (1) Good night (461) Bad night (247)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising

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  (434): I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising http://tfl.nu/mvai
  Replies (5) Good night (328) Bad night (384)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump

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  (585): Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump http://tfl.nu/n5lk
  Replies (1) Good night (396) Bad night (270)

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