Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
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