Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
You don't make any sense
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