ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Randomize
