Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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