i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize