He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize