Soap is not a condiment
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Randomize
