I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize
