Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
My balls are so social today.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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