Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
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