is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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