I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
