I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Bang-toberfest begins!!
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
