**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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