I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Randomize
