i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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