I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
