dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
