Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
