Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize