I love black thongs
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Randomize
