worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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