What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
