Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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